But Ruth replied, “Don’t urge me to leave you or to turn back from you. Where you go I will go, and where you stay I will stay. Your people will be my people and your God my God. Where you die I will die, and there I will be buried. May the LORD deal with me, be it ever so severely, if anything but death separates you and me.” Ruth 1:16-17 (NIV)
Twenty-nine years ago today at 10:00 AM, husband and I were married. Our reactions to the time of the ceremony say a lot about us. I chose the morning to be married because being the considerate person that I am and knowing how much fun there is to be had in our community, did not want our guests to waste the entire day hanging around for the church service to begin. Why sit in church even when there is wedding cake as a reward when you can go to the beach, take pictures in the park or visit a museum? I figured they could come to the wedding, have a few refreshments and be having fun by 1:00. Husband, however, threatened to put a television in the altar. Saturday mornings were for watching cartoons, not getting dressed up in a tux. Or as he responded when I asked him this morning at 9:45 what he was doing twenty-nine years ago from that moment, “sweating (his) a*s off.” In the years that have passed, our regard for television or his regard and my lack of regard, has been the one major difference we have had as a couple. He relaxes by watching television. Most of the time surfing channels or watching with his eyes closed! The more stressed he is, the longer he watches TV. I hate sitting still. Watching television seems like a great time waste to me. Why focus on someone else’s story when there are so many things to do to add to my own? I prefer to be active than passive, so we spend much of our free time apart. Crafts, gardening, reading, writing, horseback riding preoccupy my time. But, today, on our anniversary, I thought we should be together so we watched TV all afternoon. He let me chose the channel so we watched wedding shows all day. Appropriate, huh? While we watched this wedding planner give bride after bride s a $50,000 wedding and reception, husband and I wished we could do the same for our children someday. But, the truth of the matter is they will probably get the kind of event we had. I sewed my own dress and veil and arranged all the flowers while my mom made the tablecloths and my bridesmaids made their own dresses. The reception was in the church hall with our parents friends helping serve. While we spent a fraction of what those television shows used, I wonder if the brides and grooms who had the lavish ceremonies will last as long as we have? So, perhaps I should wish something just as simple for my own children. After all, it wasn’t the candles or the flowers that made our day perfect. It was the promises we made to each other and the people who came to support us as we started our new life that got us this far. Regardless of how much television we may or may not happen to watch! Happy Anniversary, dear husband!
Congratulations! Both my weddings were simple. The first one, because my parents were still in the midst of raising six kids and had no money. The second because I feel like I should pay for my own and I didn't have any money either! I rented my dress. Had one bridesmaid who rented her dress. On my wedding day, I did my own hair, put together the flowers I'd picked up the day before at the grocery store… our one 'extravagance" was having an actual photographer – and we took pictures before the ceremony.
I shake my head when I watch these bride shows and wonder how people can justify starting their life together with such a huge debt for one day. It would be different if they were buying a house – THAT would last. I don't give high odds to the couples though.