Suffering

With Caroline’s Story out for editing and reading before publication, I have people I can talk with about the book.  Today, three of us discussed who suffered more, Eliza, Julia or Caroline.  We decided Eliza did (so those of you who are afraid to read Caroline’s Story for fear it will be sad, know this:  it is sad, but not as sad as Eliza’s-does that make you feel better?). Suffering with MS seems pale compared to their hardships.  Now, it is my new normal.   I haven’t complained about my MS symptoms too much lately.  At least in a public setting.  If you ask husband, I complain all the time.  I complain my legs hurt, my hands are numb, my face burns, I am tired and I hate giving myself the shots.  Yeah, I guess I complain a lot.  Although, I do see the benefit of MS.  What other disease requires weekly massages and getting to take your dog to work?  In the last couple of days, God has thrown a lot of stuff my way about suffering.  Songs on the radio.  Books I read.   Videos show up in my Facebook news feed.  It is obvious that am not the only one who suffers.  I was listening to an interview on our local Christian radio station with Mike Weaver of the band, Big Daddy Weave.  He talked about his brother, Jay, who just had to have both feet amputated due to a bad infection.  Mike spoke about suffering in a way I never heard before.  He said depending on how we react, suffering can be a form of worship that we can only give to God while on earth.  With no suffering, pain or tears in Heaven, we won’t experience it there.  Here on earth, we can chose to glorify God in the midst of our suffering as a form of worship.  He even went on to say that just as we glorify God through our monetary gifts and use of our talents, when suffering turns our eyes to God, our response is a unique gift that only we can give to God.  Wow!  Turns that whole patience in suffering idea on its head!  So, when my legs hurt and I chose to worship God and thank Him that I can still walk, for the gift of relief my massage therapist brings, or that I can bring Cory to work with me, then, I am giving God a gift that only I can give Him!   When my face hurts, and I chose to listen to worship music or pray, then God is honored in my life.  I am not talking about the fake, life is wonderful, I am fine sort of attitude.  I mean the transparent honesty of “this is not what I expected my life to be, but in spite of the pain, in spite of the disappointment, I will chose to praise God anyway.”  All of us, at some time or another, will face suffering.  How will you respond?